ah fuck it

Ain't got nothing to talk about!  

Ppl talk about food, I don't eat.  

Ppl talk about traveling, I don't travel. 

Ppl talk about good books, I don't read.  

Ppl talk about charity, I don't care.  

Ppl talk about friend, I didn't find time to hang out with them.  

Ppl talk about politics, I don't give a damn about it.   

Ppl talk about workout regime, I don't move.

Ppl talk about talking about something, I ran outta things to talk about!

Alright guys, this is about the lamest I could get.  CUT AND PASTE TIME!  This is the usual questionnaire that I get from Myspace and I am presenting this to you now...  =)  Get to know me more like never before.  Enjoy.

.....................................................................................
Spell your name backwards
Ashay.  Hey not bad at all.  COuld be a real name!

Last time you said "I love you" to someone more then just a friend?
just now

What did you buy last?
meds

What were you doing an hour ago?
WORKING

How do you feel about gay marriage?
I don't feel anything

Are you racist?
sometimes

Last IM from?
haven't been on for days now.

What did it say?

Song you listening too?
not right now, I'm at work

Type up a line from the song
I kissed a girl and I liked it!

Where are you?
at work

Was your last ex worth it?
It was worth it while it lasts.

Are you feeling anyone?
I'm feeling my baby

Your motto?
Shut up and JUST DO.

Time?
1:04pm

Last person to tell you they liked you more then a friend?
My baby

What is going through your head?
Ache

Do you keep your promises?
I try to

Last person you talked to on the phone?
My mama

Why are you doing this?
Just to take my mind off work.

What kind of shirt you wearing?
work clothes K

Favorite candy?
chocolates, I KNOW CHOC is not a CANDY BUT I could CARELESS

Ever had any type of sexual intercourse?
Hmm.... maybe

One thing you wanna tell someone:
I love you baby

WHY U HAVE TO KILL YOURSELF?
lol coz life is tough

Do you ever wonder how other people see you?
not really

Are you the type of person who likes to be out or home?
out out out

What was the last thing that you drank?
water, but later Imma have me some ice tea with condensed milk

Has anyone ever said i love you to you and not meant it?
LOL tell me about it

Is the last person you kissed mad at you?
no

Why did you kiss the last person you kissed?
just feel like it

Who was the last person you threw out of your life?
eh

How many hours did you sleep last night?
shit like six only

Are you talkative?
yup yup yup coz i'm the only girl in da office

Last person who saw you?
my coworkers, we will be here til 73opm

In the past week have you felt stupid?
yeah when my boss asked me to write this STUPID email to our US HQ

In the past week have you gone to the pool or the beach?
no...... so sad

Did you have any unread text messages this morning when you woke up?
nope

Has anyone ever told you they want to spend the rest of their life with you?
=)

Are you in a relationship, single, "talking" to someone, complicated, married, or engaged?
I'm like not engaged LOL

Do you have a flip or slide phone?
slide phone. flip phone is so three years ago.
LOL

Have you ever broken someones heart?
nah

What is your relationship with the last person you kissed?
he takes care of me, I do his laundry those type of relationship.

Do you wish someone would call you right now?
nope, i'm working

Who was the last person you stayed up on the phone till 2am?
My baby Ray

How do you feel about the last person that called you?
no one called me

Have you ever been in handcuffs?
NOPE

Who was the last person you had a phone conversation with for more than five minutes?
Ray Ray

Recently kissed anyone with the name starting with C?
NOPE

What was the last piece of clothing you bought?
two dresses

If MySpace starts making you pay, would you still use it?
NOPE

Dark hair or light hair in the opposite sex?
no hair!!!!!!!

Who is your number one on MySpace and why?
lol i don't remember who's my number one

Would you ever consider piercing your lip?
would that help me to give a good blow job? I don't think so, so no.

Have you had sex with any of your best friends?
no no no

How is your room looking?
my room is looking great

Do you toss and turn for hours at night or fall right to sleep?
fall right to sleep baby. i make myself very tired then i go sleep.

Have you ever used a bow and arrow?
once long long time ago

Has anyone ever hung up on you?
hell yea

What is it you truly want right now?
truly want happiness and health for my fams and friends and my baby

Whens the last time you got a flower?
whoa, can't remember

Is your family a bundle of fun?
yea

Do you laugh at all the wrong times?
no

Will your next kiss be a mistake?
no

Who was the last person you talked to in person?
my coworkers

Do you think you can last in a relationship for 3 months?
OF COURSE

Do you care if people hate you for no reason?
how can they hate me for no reason? there must be something

Do you drink tea?
tea with condensed milk on ice

Do you talk about your feelings or hide them?
depends

Have you ever been out past curfew?
FUCK, dont remind me of fucking curfew

Has anyone gotten on your nerves lately?
yes, my fam

What was the last book you read?
can't remember, it's been a while since I read something

Can you make brownies without having to look at the directions?
of couse, you can't fuck a brownie up

Do you watch a lot of TV?
aint got time

Are you tanned?
not anymore

Are you afraid of falling in love?
sometimes

Do you think you are an argumentative person?
yes.

Was last weekend a good one?
very much so, tho my baby is sick but i get to take care of him

Have you ever driven into the ghetto to buy drugs?
LOL

Who did you last shoot a dirty look at?
I give dirty looks ALL THE TIME.

What is in your pockets?
no pockets today

Can you cook?
a few dishes

Have your parents ever caught you drinking?
no

Last restaurant you went to?
Can't remember.
FUCKING RINA WENT TO MY FAV RESTAURANT W/O INVITING ME!!!!!

Have you ever crawled through a window?
NOPE

Where were you at 1AM sunday morning?
blogging

Ever kissed someone over 30?
yes ^^ I still remember they names and they kisses

Is there a secret you've never told your parents?
more than what's in them black hole

Have you ever dyed your hair?
yea long time ago

How's your heart lately?
heartaches. so much things im missing out on other ppl's lives.

will this weekend be a good one?
this coming weekend. we'll see when we get there ya.


Have you ever worn the opposite sex's clothing?
no i don't.
I like to show off my womanly figure def not by wearing mens clothes

Do you have any weird inside jokes?
i dont know

Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette?
HELL YEAH.

Do you ever wonder what your ex is up to?
dont think about him all that much

Did anyone see you kiss the last person you kissed?
hehe neighbours

Does anyone call you babe?
baby when he talks to me, babe when he texts.

What was the highlight of this week or what will be?
nothin

Did you kiss or hug anyone today?
not yet ;) proly not today. I wanna go home early to chill.

Who will you see the most this weekend besides family?
Ray Ray

How late did you stay up last night and why?
One in da morning. Chatting and blogging.

Are you a morning person or a night person?
BOTH.

Have you cried today at all?
No honey, I have no reason to. I cried yesterday tho while talking to my baby about something that happened in the past.

What were you doing at 8:00 this morning?
sleeping mother fuckers.

Do you want to get married & have children one day?
I do.

Who was the last person of the opposite sex that you talked to?
Ray Ray

Are you going to have a good night?
yes sir

Do you trust all of your friends?
Do YOU trust ALL of your friends???

Are you happy?
Now I'm stressed out.

Last year today...

What if there is no aches and pains in this world?  Hmmm...  If there is no aches and pains we will not know what joy and pleasure is?  

The pain of leaving home...  The pain of leaving your second home to come back to your first home...  The heartache of leaving great friends behind you to embark on a new journey knowing that you can no longer share so closely with them...  The pain of opening up to new people... 

Last year today, I finally reached home from Chicago.  

I remember saying goodbye to Ewelina Kalinowska, still pretending that we would see each other the following monday, our usual hang out day...

I remember smelling like the stinkin cabin when my family came to pick me up from KLIA, 

I remember finding a job in September, 

I remember celebrating new year at home, 

I remember Kimmy visited me in February,

I remember finding another job in April,

I remember singing Over You on top of my lungs,

I remember finding Ray in May,

I remember my gruesome June,

I remember special events that took place in July,

And now it is August 4th 2008.  

Amongst those "I remember" so many, many, many, heartaches and heartbreaks took place.  That's why I was wondering what if there is no aches and pains?  I guess I would be a much happier person to live my life.  A quick shout out to Heay.  Thanks for replying to the questions that I've thrown out there a few entries ago. ^^  I am happy that you are glad to be alive!   I love they way you love and live life. =)

Well guys, celebrate this day with me.  ok?  August 4th.

Baby, Beer and Cheezels

Tonight baby asked what would I like for drinks.  I answered with beer please without much thought.  He was in shock!  Coz I've always been refusing alcohol.  Alcohol is bad for your liver peeps!  LOL  We went out to get some booze.  It gets kinda scary when you crave for alcohol ya? We got three 40oz and a whisky.  Errr no the whisky ain't for me.  I was enjoying my 40oz and my baby and didn't forget to have some Cheezels!

By the way guys, I haven't found my favorite Miller Genuine Draft in Malaysia.  Until then, I'll have to make do with good ol Carlsberg.  Hmm...  

Baby has ear infection since Thursday, he was not in the best of moods, he couldn't eat, yet he REFUSED to go see a doctor even when I offered to take him!!!  Luckily today I managed to get him ear drops and Ibuprofen, after a few drops in the ear, he's all better and happier.  Get well soon babe, I don't wanna see you in pain no more.  

Guys, my beer is kickin in.  I'm feelin sleepy.  Talk more later! 

Chat with dad

Yeesh came home late as usual, around 1130pm. I was fucking speeding so that I could lay my head down sooner.  Well look at what I'm doing now??  Anywho, my dad is still up watching TV because this man cannot sleep.  =)  I dropped my bag and keys and started munching on homemade wholemeal buns.  So I started telling my dad how my day went, how Hanafi and I were swamped with phone calls and unfinished business, how we didn't get the chance to sort out tasks leftover from our weekend event like COUNTING STOCKS!!!!  Oopps, I may be saying too much here.  God knows who's reading.  My dad also started telling me stories about his work during younger days, how he got the nerves to talk to his boss the way he did (straight up no bull).  I asked my dad weren't you afraid you'll lose your job?  He said he knew his boss wouldn't.  Stories aside, I felt so so so nice to have chatted with my dad.  My dad is AWESOME!  I mean he is really good in what he's doing even when he was young!!!!!!  Things he said to his boss makes me wish I could talk to my boss the way he did.  He will deliver his point even if it means making the boss looks bad in front of clients.  WHOA!  At last I said to my dad, wow I need a few LONG years to speak with skills like yours.  He replied me with don't be worrying about the sky falling down because even if it does, you alone cannot carry it...  Oh oh oh during our conversation, he also said I will not lose sleep over things I cannot change nor control.  For example, his boss's stupid decisions!  LOL.  

There are so many ways in looking at life.  Some people choose to be engage in very single moment.  Some people choose to let life flow.  What did you choose?  

p.s.  A very very very funny quote for you "I don't have down syndrome...  I'm ASIAN"  I laughed my ass off when I saw this quote.  Funny ha ha.  =)

p.p.s.  As I'm writing this, babyface is on my playlist.  LOVES IT!  Wanna dedicate this song to you all.  Where Will You Go-- Babyface.  

August 1st 2008

I know you love hearing that story over and over again.  The story about what happened when we met for the first and second time.  LOL.  Tonight, you made me tell this story again.  It makes my heart goes ah~~ when I saw the look on your face, in your eyes while listening to me...  ;)  I love you baby.  I also apologized to you every time I tell this story.  Coz it reminds me of how mean and what a bitch I was to you...  

Tonight you said, baby thank you for giving me a chance to be with you.  I said thank you baby for giving me time and allowing me to know you.  Like you've always said, with time... we'll understand each other more...  Baby you thought me to slow down, stop, look, and listen.  Mankind these days are used to fast pace lives, I am one of them, still.  But you made me make time to listen to you, I was so impatient sometimes I don't even care to let you finish what you have to say.  Now, I do.  Being able to open heart, open mind and listen to someone is not a gift, it is a skill.  I thank you for introducing it to me and I still got a lot to learn, please bare with me k baby?    

I asked you once and only once, why do you love me?  You said baby I love you the first time I saw you.  =)  I guess that was why you kept asking me do I believe in love at first sight.  I was so stupid then, I didn't get your hint hint.  LOL.  I kept telling you, NO NO NO, who still believes in love at first sight?  Apparently that person is you... 

I'm sure that this road will not be easy for us.  No matter how hard this road would be, I'm glad that you will be the one walking next to me...

I love you babe    

Repetitive and long winded

Do you wonder sometimes when do I get sometime off alone?  I got a little tips for ya.  Late night driving ALONE, preferably on a highway so you don't get that many traffic lights.  I'm serious y'all.  I was kinda on an auto pilot while driving home tonight.  As usual my wednesday night ends a little after midnight, tonight it was just Hanafi and I.  Most of tonight, I was tidying up our storage room, it's been in a mess since last friday.  =)  Feeling pretty peaceful inside, though two men pissed me off big time.  These two men are one of our client's drivers, while I was killing myself lugging big heavy bags into the office.  They just STOOD there and WATCHED.  I was like oh my fucking god.  Not like they don't know me, not like they don't know we have to do this every wednesday.  I mean are ppl really that dense in they heads?  

Hey, back to my lonely drive home.  I truly enjoyed it. Every single time.  I could go like 40mph and no one would be bothering me.  I could go like 100mph and I wouldn't bump into anyone ^^.  Most of the times, I go SLOW, real SLOW...  Enjoying the peace that we normally don't get driving during daytime.  You will get more than just peace in mind, you will also get cool midnight air for free!!!!  Turn off your a/c baby and enjoy the ride.  =)  I love it, I believe you'll love it too.  

Am listening to a song that reminds me of old times...  Don't Know Why-- Nora Jones.  Tomorrow is my Marketing Director's last day with us.  After work, we'll head over to Saisaki, the Japanese Buffet Restaurant, supposedly good food.  =)  I could careless about the food, I just wanna chill with them.  Oh on the side note, just in case you're wondering how come my recent posts have no pictures.  That's because I don't have time to upload them onto the bucket.  Ya know, my weekends don't belong to me.  However, you have a little more time on hand.  Please check out this website.

www.ted.com

Hang on, am chatting with Rina.  I gotta end it here.  Adios!!!

Remember Randy Pausch?

He is gone. He was only 47.

Check here and here for more information.

R.I.P.